1 month ago tomorrow my life was completely flipped upside down. I woke up like any school morning. I had my backpack packed with 1 full large Gatorade, an anatomy text book, 4 composition books, two binders full of paper, and a tablet. I carried on my morning routine. Got dressed, got my coffee ready, and headed out the door to go pick up the girls and go to school. The ride to school was nice. Had my two best friends, my little homie sister with me, and i was headed in to begin my last semester (what is supposed to be the best semester) of high school. We get to the school, see some friends and begin walking in the school. We were literally all just discussing how the day prior I slipped in the parking lot and fell. I had just gotten the words "be careful not to fall" out of my mouth when all of a sudden both my legs fly out from under me and I hit the ground. The second I hit was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. The wind was knocked out of me but I had just enough to tell my friends i was not okay. I remember looking over at my coffee and wondering how it didn't spill when I fell. How it was still standing like nothing ever happened? I remember hearing voices around me..But I dont know what they were saying and I couldn't find words to answer them even if I understood. All I can remember is laying there watching the students walk by me as I lay in the floor barely conscious. I knew my back was broken when I hit the ground. Because I had never felt a worse pain. A pain that paralysed my whole body, and sent me into shock. I don't remember much from the school. I think I blacked out in the floor because next thing I remember they're picking me up and putting me in a wheel chair. I felt so much pain in my back, but I couldn't feel anything else but tingling. My legs were numb but my feet were tingling, and my arms were completely numb. I felt nautious like I was gonna throw up, but I couldnt. And I wanted so bad to lay down because my back was hurting so bad. But i couldnt move. I was stuck in a wheel chair. I don't remember anything else up until my mom got there. I didn't know where exactly in the school I was..because I don't really remember the ride there. But I do remmeber hearing a teacher day "she looks like she just died." As the assistant principal wheeled me out to my car every bump And crevice in the pavement sent a shot of pain. The whole drive to the hospital was agonizing. But I couldnt cry anymore. I was past that point. And I was so tired. We sat in the emergency room car port for 20 minutes at tenova waiting for someone to come get me out of the car. We get inside..and wait another 3 hours to be seen. I don't remember much of anything from the waiting room. But I know that I was going unconscious the whole time. They finally decided to take me back because I could no longer feel my legs at all and my hands were blue. Friday, January 13th was the worst day of my life. Tomorrow will be February 13th and I still can't go to school when its raining. Every time I walk through Cleveland high schools doors I get sick to my stomach. There were no wet floor signs. No carpets. Nothing to catch the rain from people's shoes. And now im paying for it. By walking inside and seeing myself laying on the floor. I don't get a full night of sleep anymore because i cant get comfortable. I wake up sweating and hurting because I'm forced to lay in one position all night that ive never been able to sleep in. I have to go to a salon to have my hair washed because its to dangerous to even attempt to move me around that much when I get to take a bath. Because without the brace I must be completely straight and completely still. My life was taken away from me. I used to go so many places, do so many things and have so much fun. Now I'm lucky to leave my house for an hour or so. And I'm pretty much always at home. Ive missed a month of pay checks that I really do need. I missed out on the winter formal because I was hospitalized. Ill miss out on the whole prom experience because literally who wants to go to prom with a full upper body plastic cast. I have raw skin from being rubbed constantly by this brace. I wake up at night literally choking because my brace slides up and pushes into my throat. I can never again ride roller coasters, and I will live with back pain for the rest of my life. Ill be lucky to graduate without wearing the brace. Although I get better every day, it doesnt ever get easier. I may only have to take a pain pill in the morning and at night, but that doesn't change the way people stare when I pass by with my walker. I may be able to walk without the walker at home, but I keep finding myself waking up from the same nightmare that's not so make believe..but real. I know I should be happy it wasn't worse, but I truly can't find anything positive about this. Don't ever take forgranted being able to live your life freely and love it. Because when you can't anymore..its All miserable. I can't wait for 2019. Because so far 2018 has been nothing but miserable. gray styled items to wear for maid of the brides